Here at the Majlis we voice our thoughts; worries and concerns .. We resonate our inner self and we chill out as well.. This Majlis is our space to relax even if it seems impossible at times ..
One last thing; you don't need to knock on my doors; IYM does not have closed doors !
Welcome to the Majlis :)

Yes Italy.. " Perfoomeh "

>> Saturday, December 18, 2010

I called my dearest friend Sammo in Saudi Arabia a couple of days ago.. after touching base; she goes " Aren't you thinking of traveling somewhere just to freshen up ? "

Yes Sammo I need to re-energize my moments and do some thought clearing.. I do need to travel; refresh and unwind.. I was thinking of a travel destination lately .. I'm thinking eihter France or Italy but I think I'll end up going to Italy.. I need to be surrounded by an unfamiliar language that is so vibrant and full of life..I also need to dive in my favorite pasta dishes before I consider seriously loosing the extra pounds that sneaked and resided comfortably in my pants lately.. LOL

I think the youtube clip is Italian.. am I right ?

This time for sure I'll run away with an art piece from Florence even if it takes me joining the Mafia for it ;)



A Perfect Exit

>> Friday, December 3, 2010

Is my exit from my wave as perfect as well ? Time will only tell..



Diffusion of Mind

>> Monday, November 22, 2010

Yes it is diffusion of mind what I am going through these days.. don't be surprised if I confess that the past that I cursed and kept cursing for a long period of time seems not too bad compared to my current days.. it feels so trivial.. all I have left is memories of memories !

And yes I'm living a state of mind diffusion .. I am 'stoned'.. drugged by discouragement.. miss-shaped by misfortune.. am I making any sense here ? Why did I come back to this land ? Why did I give myself the ' right of return ' ? What on Earth did I do to myself and to my career ?!

I don't even have much to say.. all I need to know is " When is it going to be all over ? "

I guess I better start taking some serious actions soon .. I should migrate with winter birds !



Today's Quiz

>> Thursday, October 7, 2010

I just fell in love with this painting during my one week Amsterdam visit.. it's one of the master pieces displayed at the Rijks Museum.. look at how beautifully and artistically the colours are blended.. I got its mug and a 1000-piece puzzle game which would be challenging to assemble but I think it'll be fun !
Who can tell the story behind it ? Who can also read my mind and guess which other painting I also wanted to steel from the Museum ?


Late Evening Thoughts

>> Sunday, October 3, 2010

  • And I find myself at cross-roads again; I just hate it when it happens to me ! Although I know deep inside that at the end of my insomnic days; Bing-chocolate eating and my anger outbursts that I thank my family for tolerating.. I know at the end of all this self-inflicted drama I get what I want and I follow the path I'm destined to have.. I still hate this state of mind I'm living.. I hope I have a different awareness of what cross-roads are meant to be; not for anything; just for better tolerance of what it's coasting !
  • And the thought of calling him to hear his calm self-reassuring voice is tingling my inner being this evening .. Should I do it or not ? It's been almost 2 months and 20 days since I last indulged on his existence in my life, since I last got 'tickled' by his manhood, since I last felt like a real woman; like Aphrodite .. Even though it was a break-up; he was fully present in the moment for it and for me ! Yes I miss you and yes as much as waves of sadness has been mapping my shores lately ; as much as I enjoyed the rides and the tides ! I hope you are doing well and feeling good tonight ! I still need you by my side !
  • What would it take to stop being so picky ? What would it take to stop analysing the differences between a Channel mascara and a Christian Dior one.. at the end they are both mascaras ?! Should I call myself insane for the time spending at Dubai mall yesterday shopping for a mascara and then getting rid of it today ?! It helps sometimes not to have so many options because then we end up settling with none ! I wish there was only one brand of make-up to wear and for sure one brand of men to share life with ! Oops, am I day-dreaming / night-dreaming here ?!
  • I am short of one-million Dollars .. can someone water; flower and flourish my bank account ?! Maybe I should convince myself " I already have 20-million Dollars as assets in cash and it feels so good and healthy to be rich and to grow richer and richer with time ".. the illusion might work.. what do you think ?!

Time for a movie on MBC-2; and then a candle might help dissolve some of my evening thoughts induced turmoil.. although I doubt it..

Good night.. Bon Nuit..



Join me for a weekend chill out

>> Thursday, September 16, 2010

Add to it dim light.. nice aroma.. drinks and viola :)
Enjoy your weekend..



I Did It My Way

>> Monday, September 13, 2010

Yes I did it my way ;)


A Snake I Am.. Benign !

>> Saturday, September 11, 2010

Appear and disappear.. should I call myself a snake in the continuous phase of changing skins.. or an ocean whale who's back waving loudly with it's ignorant tale ?
I leave the judgement to my blog readers who are less than 10 but do count a lot ..
All I know for now is that the transition from a North American living to UAE living is just taking it's time and it might never have a final shape and identity ! I just feel very 'fluidy' for now ! Are you surprised ? Please don't be !
Mentalities and people alike here are shaped in an inflexible pattern; non-negotiable belief system; anything that challenges that stove-molded pattern is cursed; is of devilish rather than divine nature..
Why do you feel so challenged if you're so right ? a basic and a simple question that does not need an answer for sure.. we all know what the answer is !
And don't get me wrong here.. I'm not talking religion or philosophies.. the space of personal freedom with these two issues is very much respected.. I'm talking work here and the long dreamed-of non-existent professional environment at our Governmental sectors.. What the hill is going on ?! Are we asking millions of Dollars or what ? It really takes nothing to be nice to and professional with your colleagues.. it takes nothing to respect each other.. it takes nothing to accept the qualifications of those who were in exile for so long in order to best serve their country at the end and their people.. But it takes one thing for sure: it takes a genuine feeling of service for anyone to grow professionally..
In our pure local jargon we just describe this type of unprofessionalism as " 3aib "..
Hope the aliens get it..
Good night..


Cruelty Wine

>> Wednesday, June 9, 2010

" Lost in the maze of delusion and illusion of having temporary colourful days; I wish I was shot in the head the moment I felt the presence of a soul mate; and believed it so much to the extent of enjoying the euphoria of being in a trance.. a trance of comfort and inner stability..

I just hate myself.. and I hate my days..

And I'm still sipping on life's cruelty wine.. drunk and shattered on the streets that distance us apart.. I hate my destiny..

Do you really have to kill our love for each other ? If so, then please kill me before you do so.. I mean it.. a shot in the head is all it takes..

I'm looking for a gun.. and sipping more on this cruelty wine "

She wrote in her diary tonight..


Chilling Out

>> Friday, May 21, 2010

My music company while commuting to and from work.. enjoy this very well crafted piece of love..



Dissociated Spirits

>> Saturday, April 24, 2010

Are we living the time of dissociated spirits ? Or our mind had always been tinged with this unsettling unease since the beginning of humanity ? All I know for now is that tonight I belong to the dissociated spirit co-op as much as I belong to my Pralino chocolate box that my sister ordered from Lebanon !
Psychologists name it an adjustment period.. To me, it serves nothing on the other hand but amplify the cultural gap that I realized was embedded deep in me the moment I decided to leave my country and live abroad for x number of years to obtain my postgraduate qualifications .. At times while being abroad, my moments felt like an infinity that was artistically shaped with beauty and misery at the same time; a unique piece of sculpture resembling in its finest details a lunar eclipse that was going through brightness and darkness simultaneously at its core ! That was the sculpture of my life ! Now that I'm sculptured and shaped all over; in and out; I find it hard to follow 'a' path around Earth again; 'their' Earth.. 'their' path !
Pralino water my mouth again please !
Strange is the world around me.. strangers are my work mates.. strangers are my family members.. strange it feels when I walk the corridors in the malls; drive down jammed roads.. strange it feels when I sip on our Arabic coffee.. awkward it feels when I put on the Abaya.. this planet I'm living is not mine !
All I can remember vividly from time to time is my childhood and not the years I spent in preparation for my lengthy travel to North America.. My memory of being a medical student once is very vague.. very distant.. very blurred.. and yet it is still very vibrant and full of life the moment my childhood friend hugged me in a hidden place one afternoon when he was knocking the door of his teenage years and wanted to do what men did in black and white Egyptian movies !
Pralino chocolate be my best friend please !
Tonight is a strange night.. and tomorrow is another strange day.. dead rhythms.. dead colleagues.. and a dead on-call duty.. my spirit is dissociated.. I cannot have a soft hand on it again; it doesn't exist to be soothed; no warmth.. no gentelness.. all I am for now is a physical body with coordinated digits typing this post on this strange new planet that I cannot function as a revolving moon around !
Pralino chocolate.. Oops the box is empty !


A beautiful letter

>> Friday, January 8, 2010

Life is full of unique secrets to say the least.. only the wise can touch their hidden beautiful cannotations and transform them into reality.. into an existing living being..
Here is a letter that I recieved less than 24 hours ago.. and yes it is the most beautiful letter I've ever read.. I couldn't help while reading it but to have an honest moment with my soul.. there was a pause and with it there was full consciousness; a level of consciousness that is usually experienced during birth and death of loved ones.. most of the time we are barely there; semi-consciuss as described in my medical books..
This letter was written to me by life itself.. and it is a being on its own.. didn't I tell you life if full of unique secrets ?!
I'll let you read it.. while I'm still speechless having a pause.. and yes it emits warmth; comfort and consolation.. and you cannot help but let your soul indulge in smiles..
" You know IYM, life is a very interesting phenomenon. We come, we live, and we go. The only ones who actually LIVE are the ones who live while sharing the whispers with the Beloved. Who are daring enough to loose all their senses in the quest of the truth of their potential and end up giving off the scent of the breath of the Beloved. Who are bold enough to face life head on and can dance like a stream, and contain themselves in a vessel at the same time.
You, my dear, are on that path. The path of those daring and bold, who actually LIVE :). I have not seen you, but even from such distances, the aura of strength that your personality exudes, is so tangible. At times life may not be a smooth sail for you, but that is because you ARE capable of cruising the ship even when the sea is rough. Do you realize what blessing is this? :) This is the blessing of being trusted, trusted to be capable of handling the situations come what may! Trusted to be adaptable and preservative enough to be a dancing stream when the times ask, and to be still waters when times change.
You my dear, have been strong, because that is the only way you can be :). There is no other alternative. Pause. One can not expect a fish to soar a flight, like an eagle can not be expected to swim under the sea beds. That is exactly how it is in your case, you can not do it any other way than excelling it. You just can not :)
The paths, the routes, the maps do get tricky at times. But what remains unchanged, unfizzled, is the undying fighter's spirit that makes up your person. The flame of strength that alights your torch remains a life long treasure hunt for many. So its just that befitting way of acknowledging your true potential and personal integrity, that life keeps on challenging you; and continue being surmounted like only you could do.
Believe you me, you too couldn't live it any other way; you are too ALIVE to let life come easy to you :)

May you always ace whatever you do,May you always be fragrant with the scent of the Beloved,May your stillness bear a rhythem of movement,and may your moves bear the grace of calm oceans.amen. "
God bless the sender.. 'life' she is


A perfectionist performance !

>> Monday, January 4, 2010

Romance in its perfectionist performance equals one of H. Al Jasmi's songs..
It made me speechless.. my memories are doing most of the conversational work right now !

Enjoy it..
[ Leenah please tell me you understand a bit of Arabic ]

Goodnight all..



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