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Here at the Majlis we voice our thoughts; worries and concerns .. We resonate our inner self and we chill out as well.. This Majlis is our space to relax even if it seems impossible at times ..
One last thing; you don't need to knock on my doors; IYM does not have closed doors !
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Dissociated Spirits

>> Saturday, April 24, 2010

Are we living the time of dissociated spirits ? Or our mind had always been tinged with this unsettling unease since the beginning of humanity ? All I know for now is that tonight I belong to the dissociated spirit co-op as much as I belong to my Pralino chocolate box that my sister ordered from Lebanon !
Psychologists name it an adjustment period.. To me, it serves nothing on the other hand but amplify the cultural gap that I realized was embedded deep in me the moment I decided to leave my country and live abroad for x number of years to obtain my postgraduate qualifications .. At times while being abroad, my moments felt like an infinity that was artistically shaped with beauty and misery at the same time; a unique piece of sculpture resembling in its finest details a lunar eclipse that was going through brightness and darkness simultaneously at its core ! That was the sculpture of my life ! Now that I'm sculptured and shaped all over; in and out; I find it hard to follow 'a' path around Earth again; 'their' Earth.. 'their' path !
Pralino water my mouth again please !
Strange is the world around me.. strangers are my work mates.. strangers are my family members.. strange it feels when I walk the corridors in the malls; drive down jammed roads.. strange it feels when I sip on our Arabic coffee.. awkward it feels when I put on the Abaya.. this planet I'm living is not mine !
All I can remember vividly from time to time is my childhood and not the years I spent in preparation for my lengthy travel to North America.. My memory of being a medical student once is very vague.. very distant.. very blurred.. and yet it is still very vibrant and full of life the moment my childhood friend hugged me in a hidden place one afternoon when he was knocking the door of his teenage years and wanted to do what men did in black and white Egyptian movies !
Pralino chocolate be my best friend please !
Tonight is a strange night.. and tomorrow is another strange day.. dead rhythms.. dead colleagues.. and a dead on-call duty.. my spirit is dissociated.. I cannot have a soft hand on it again; it doesn't exist to be soothed; no warmth.. no gentelness.. all I am for now is a physical body with coordinated digits typing this post on this strange new planet that I cannot function as a revolving moon around !
Pralino chocolate.. Oops the box is empty !

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